July 4th 2007

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The Lost Files

I lost my cell phone last week saturday. I had these videos on it that I had emailed to myself. Here are two of them.

stop

today.stop.i.stop.existed.iamtrying.stop.
to.sptop.myself.stop.from.stop.hitting.stop.the.spacebar.thisisreallyweird.stop.
oldhabit.diehard.towgirlsandacupisgross.stop.iboughtcomicstoday.stop.goodbye.stop.

One a Day

Hello reader. Please come back. I will have songs and pictures and videos up here soon. And things you can buy and all that good stuff. Trust me. This will not be my journal, but my pallet.

The Fighter

Darkness descends

Reset

Wus up strangers, ghost and whatnot, I have a lot of work to do. Too much. As the Beatles say, "help".

So I do have readers

Hello y'all. I have reader. One to five o' y'all. Anyway, went to nice new restaurant in town today, Mexican food. Chiptole. Pretty good. Anyway I bought a data cable for my phone. So soon I will be posting video and images from my phone. Stay tuned still. The camera will make a timely return. But for now, the phone has it.

The Weekend at Large VMA's included.

What a weekend I had. Went to a party at Island Rock on Thursday night. Had a blast. Danced with a bunch of girls. Friday I got paid. My short term memory seems to be going cause I can hardly remember the things I do sometimes. I believe I went to Jamaica avenue on Friday evening to sell some mixtapes. Saturday I put a car on ebay for someone. Pray it sells. Here is the link 98 Nissan Maxima se
I also got some comics. Look for more comic posts. I'm a do this right. Trust me. I got Kanye West's album also. Pretty good stuff.
Sunday I did my laundry. Fixed the car radio in my Ford Explorer. I should have pictures of all of this but I don't. I will soon though. I'm a draw some considerable attention though. Taking pictures and shit. Then I did a job with my dad. Made a little pocket change. Then I came home and watched the VMA's. Brittney looks fat. She was the shit seven years ago. She pails to what she was then. but then again so do I. Seven years ago I had a full hairline. She is trying though. See where she goes. Kanye had the best performance of the night to me however. He rocked it wit T Pain. Get your hands high y'all. Keep on chucking. The Black Rider rides again.

Lately

I do not know why I am doing this but I guess its better than not doing it so here goes. I could be doing more with my blog and I will. I promise you I will. I got Kanye West's album today. Pre release. Not his best work. Still good however. Bought a Passa Passa DVD last week. Watched it today. Waste. Er one's trying to be a reality tv star. I wanted to see a party. Instead it them fucking around in their hotel and everything. Waste. Well there goes. See yall later. Yeah right. Yall aint even reading.

Nothing

Wus up strangers. Nothing going on tonight. Nothing on today. Nothing going on period. Went to party last night and got trashed. Should have took some pictures but there were too many girls there, so I partied instead of documented. Beenie man was there. I was drunk as hell. Got a ride home from my friend and his wife, my cousin took me to pick up my car today. Thank God for good friends. I've never been that drunk in a very very long time.
I rented "Fracture" last night, staring Ryan Gosling and Antony Hopkins. Good movie but not all that I had expected it would be. Anyway guys, I got a lot of thinking and sorting out to do. The Black Rider is under some duress, so to my two viewers a day, stay tuned. This blog is gonna get a whole lot better.

Being Part 2

Wus up Blogland? It's your boy The Black Rider again with another rip from the tip. What have I got for you today? Well still ain't got no new pictures so sorry about that, not that y'all care anyway, I'm only averaging like two page views a day according to Google analytics. So for the two I have today, I ain't got no pictures. Suck it up.

Well, I've seen some more movies. I seen "The Perfect Stranger" staring Halle Berry and Bruce Willis. Very bad movie. That movie is so bad. Halle Berry is sexy in it though. Very nice looking is she. And they make good use of that showing the back of her breasts and having her in a few sex scenes, though no full on frontal nudity of her melons in this flick however. Bottomline, the story lines in this movie are ridiculous, not that I'm going to spoil this ridiculous attempt of a movie for anyone, but for those of you who haven't seen it (Don't see it y'all) the twist in the end is just lazy. Same thing like Basic Instinct 2. I'm tired of movies where they feel as if they are tricking you all along and pull of some implausible twist at the end. It's ridiculous. WE DON'T BELIEVE YOU.

A good movie however is "The Good Shepherd". That movie I enjoyed a lot. Brilliantly paced and superbly directed by Mr. Robert Di Nero. Not too crazy about the racial undertones throughout the movie as I am a black man living in Long Island, New York, you white folks can keep your dirty laundry to yourselves please. This movie has got everything man, an all star cast, Matt Damon, Angelina Jolie, Alec Baldwin, William Hurt, and Robert Di Nero, the director and credited as a producer this time around takes a turn as acting as well.

I tell you, they got a Pathmark in my neighborhood, where I can rent DVD's for one dollar a day plus nine cents tax. It's this DVD machine. Fucking great it is. I been watching great movies to awful movies. I been watching so many movies I want to make a movie.


Well tha's it for now. If I had a dollar I would go to a club later tonight. But alas I'm perpetually broke as of late. No going out for the broke pocketed. So with these few words I say adieu to my two viewers a day, RIP Merv Griffin, and Godspeed Micheal Vick. Remember Mike, the rule is to "spay and neuter" not "slay and torture" your pets. Peace deux.

Being

I love my George foreman grill. Today I grilled hot dogs, chicken, burgers, bacon, potatoes, the potatoes did not go too well, but everything else did. George foreman grilled hot dogs taste so good on a Sunday. Nathan's hot dogs are the best. Oscar Mayer is pretty good too but it ain't no Nathan's. Meat and bread can get pretty pricey too. Good hot dogs and burgers can easily run you thirty bucks. That not including the bread. But you get home and grill it up on the bachelor's stove, it's all worth it. Right?

Usually on a Sunday my mom cooks an elaborate Sunday dinner with rice and peas and baked chicken and vegetables and potatoes. Not today. My parents are in Florida. They will be back come Tuesday. Did not go any parties last night. My partying has gone down significantly since last year. I been home every night this weekend. Which isn't to say I wont go out later tonight. It's still not midnight as I am writing this. And it probably won't be by the time I publish it. but it's more likely that I stay home tonight. I don't feel very restless.

I rented Basic Instinct 2 today. What a wretch of a movie. Lots of nakedness and sex. So what? This movie sucks ass. It's director should be taken out into the street and shot. I like a bad movie every now and then. But not this bad. Who makes movies like this. Were they all drunk out of their heads when they made this movie? I was a little drunk when I watched it (two Kettel One's and Cranberry juice and one Bacardi and Sunkist orange soda) and this movie still sucked ass. The sex scenes look like dry hump rehearsal and I watched the unrated version. Ugh.

TV was good. Girls tennis. Girls volleyball. Butt cheeks and butt cracks, nothing to complain about there. Unless its in Basic Instinct 2. Or is that movie supposed to be called Basic Inc STINKS too? You tell me.

And now I'm blogging about nothing. I'm Seinfeld remix, if I I should be so bold. With no pictures again. Not to worry though. I will be taking copious photographs this week. Look forward to some nice things.

Goon night

What's to say about the weekend so far. I saw the movie "Shooter" starring Mark Wahlberg and Danny Glover. Rented it from the Path Mark DVD machine. Dollar a day plus tax. Good movie. Also got some repairs done on my car. My parents are away in Florida right now. My brother is at a party. I'm home all alone today. Very empty inside here. I'm a go out and do something tonight. Don't know what yet. Have car will travel. We'll ser what happens.

No Pictures

No pictures today. This was a very uneventful weekend. Did not even rent a movie. My Long Island life is paced and mundane at best right now. Spurred with a few shows and performances by my band and artist Profisi Culcha every now and then, I live a pretty boring life. Well when I have something real to write about I will. Till then, have fun folks and be good to each other. BTY, RIP Merv Griffin.

Crash

Her neck smelled like hibiscus. I could lay my nose there all night and never come up for air. her skin was as soft as baby wipes. How tender and frail she was, and in the grasp of my strong hands, see seemed even so much more vulnerable. In our ferocious embrace, I beheld my every want and desire in a fiery cocoon.

"This is why we cannot be friends" she says.
In my mind I'm thinking she is so right. I am in love with her though I will never tell her, and she knows that I love her, though she will never let me know it.

"You have to go now. He will be here any minute. You cannot be here any longer."

It grudges me to leave. I am a nice enough guy. She is not my girlfriend, wife, nor fiance. She cannot be. The cheap wine we drank has not made me drunk enough to use inebriation as an excuse to hang around. I leave in humility with the image of her ample bosom fixed on face. At least i can still think about her. Whoever is picking her up now will have to compete with the work I have just done. And if I played my cards right, that hickey I left on her neck should provide just enough consternation to ruin her date.

I drive home in my beat up four door coup. A sky blue 1987 BMW. Snazzy ride for a 24 year old man in 2005 still living with his parents.

The road is dark, I do not know my way. I call my friend five times to help with directions. The glasses of wine inside me do not help any.

Two days later, I'm drinking again. Haven't said much to my amour. We are not in love I keep telling myself. I am a fool really, for I imagine that she will one day come to love me, though she tread me as feet does a wine press.

My friends and I are going to have a good time tonight. We are going to drink and smoke and fuck some sexy girls.

I've already have two glasses of Jamaican rum. We are smoking weed now. I am not really a weed smoker. I'm driving now. We are going to the club. I wipe out on the highway.

My car spins three times. The first time it spins everything slows down. A car drives by me at what appears to be five miles an hour. I hold on to my steering wheel extra tight. "Ten minutes after ten" I tell myself. "Ten past ten." Wham. I hit the divider. A concrete wall about three feet high that runs for about fifty miles or so. Sparks fly from the hood of the trunk as it slides along the concrete, the car is still going at about ninety miles an hour or so.

Another spin, I'm back in the middle of the road. Wham, I hit the divider again. This time I'm ejected from my seat. My head slams on the roof of the car. I feel something hit my nose. The car spins again and stops parked parallel to the divider facing the oncoming traffic in the center of an eight lane highway.

The car is smoking. I look into the rear view mirror to take a look at my face. Everything is OK. I feel my legs. Everything is OK. The car is smoking. It might explode. I do not know. I have to get out of there.

I open the door as best I can, unbuckle my seat belt and run. I'm running down the highway from a smoking car.

My friend saw the accident. They were ahead of me. I look at them. they look at me. They hug me. "The car just spin. I dunno what happened but it just started spinning."

"Lets get outa here before the police come. We do not want the to start asking questions"

I got to call home. Where is my phone? It's in the car. I think about leaving my phone behind. But that girl. I do not know her number by heart. If I leave my phone, I may never hear from her again.

The car is smoking, hssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss. "I'll be right back" I tell my friends. "I'll be right back."

Dony V tv

Have a Heart

On sunday, my band played at a charity event. the have a heart foundation, a charity event for familie that have children that live with cancer.

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Get your own

Teflon Party

What a Saturday night I had this weekend. Seen to fight coming home from the city on the LIRR. I do not have any photographs of that unfortunately. But I got pictures of the party I went to. This record is supposed to be coming out soon and The Black rider is involved. This is how we celebrated on Saturday night.

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Family BBQ

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BBQ

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Get your own

Happy Times

Video to come soon.

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The Finished Product

my state

Stalemate.

The Will To Win

One must find this. the will to win. Without it, one's life is lost. There must be adversaries and there must be circumstances to overcome, to give life, in the totality of it all, completeness.

Certain Death

Breaking free. Escape. It is what all bound men and women aim to do. Create a shelter for oneself and explore the unknown. However it seems rather difficult to do so under the confines and auspices of a full time job making someone else wealthy rather than making yourself wealthy. What is the secret. How do you get the limitless energy to put others demands of yourself aside and put yourself fist. I conclude that to do this and to survive this process, you must assume the position of king of your own domain. Lord of your own time, and you must fight to defend it, and fight to expand it as well. Life is as war and war is as life. And so it is.

Today Tomorow

Today tomorrow, tomorrow today. Something bout the way that works huh? I'm really trying to be productive right now. What are the effective ways to grow and prosper? What are the effective ways to be successful? Who will have to be left by the wayside? What are the decisions that must be made to efficaciously promote success?
The answers to these questions I try to find. The promotion of success and prosperity. The removal of hate and complacency. The single mindedness of a hero.

50th POst!

This is my fiftieth post on this blog. Very Nice.

My Cards

The Inefective

I've found that posting business cards on the windshield wipers and windows of cars is an extremely inefective way of self promotion. Next try, posting them up on lightpost and hand to hand. See how much that works out. Try the internet as well.

Stay Tuned

Stay tuned to "The Black Rider" ladies and getlemen. Soon I will be incoopoerating video and pictures from my daily life. This will include exploits from my band, Profisi Culcha, my business, my music and everything thing else. Going to be a great ride.

Day by Day

The Black rider Returns. Stay tuned folks....

Rest in peace 'Cap

Rest In Peace, 'Captain

Captain America is dead. What does this mean, and how does this happen? The pop icon for freedom and liberty passed away shot down by a snipers bullet in Captain America number 25. What does this symbolize for our western culture and our morals and values? To answer this question, first a little history.

As a lad growing up in Jamaica, West Indies I was a comic book fanatic. Every Saturday at the supermarket my goal was to hang out by the magazine stand and read all the comics on there. Superman, Spider-man, The Incredible Hulk, X men, Iron man, but I never really got into Captain America. He was extremely idealistic and the only place I came across him was in the Avengers series as he was their leader. He was always strong and wise and sagelike, with his super soldier powers and his Shield.

His story was an engrossing one how he fought Nazi's in WWII and was frozen in Antarctica only to be unearthed decades later to fight evil again in the Post Modern Era.

Thing was I wanted a Captain Jamaica too. But there was no Captain Jamaica or Captain Europe or Captain Africa or Captain Mexico or Captain South America. Captain America was it and that was that. I mean you had Superman and Batman too who were universal in their appeal of mortal men assuming extra ordinary roles. And they killed Superman too. Doomsday. It was huge. And and he returned from the dead too like Jesus did, fighting his way out of hell. I read it. But that was before 9/11, in peacetime. Israel and Pakistan were shaking hands. Clinton was the President of America and he assumed leader of the free world. It was a different time. It was the right time for Superman to die. It was the time of Jurassic Park and The Little Mermaid. We wanted to be terrified. And with all that prosperity and Liberty flowing throughout the West, Captain America was there, leading the avengers in the make believe universe fighting imaginary monsters.

Things are different this time. We need Captain America. The world does. We need a beacon of hope. Spider-man does not do it. He is too smug and not very noble.

In a world of global warming and Hurricane Katrina and an Occupation in Iraq, war in Afghanistan, the threat of nuclear war from North Korea and Iran, and the doomsday clock inching really close to twelve,the world is teetering on collapse.

They've killed superheroes before, Charles Xavier, the leader for the X men died, they cloned Spider man in the comics, dreadful mistake, the Killed the Thor, but they never did kill Captain America. They froze him to bring him back again. This time is different though. He dies. I've read the comics detailing his death and they did it great justice. The art and imagery is captivating, Marvel is on top of its game. My friends, at a time when the world needs Captain America he is murdered to boost sales.

That is sad to me but clearly honest. His death creates an interest, at midtown comics on 40th street and 7th avenue on Wednesday the flock of consumers racking up the Captain America titles were massive. And as it is in the real world so it is int he fantasy of many a fan-boy and fan-girl. The universe is in ambiguity with no strong leadr at a time of turmoil.

Who is our leader? President Bush who was once well liked by the heartland of America has a struggling approval rating and is losing power in his White House as he removes dictators and fights for 'freedom', Clinton who brought us peace and a balanced budget is an old fogey in his 60's (a time when many men are at their political prime) looking at the world turn without his calm steady hand. Joe Di Maggio is long dead so don't look to him. Michael Jordan is retired, Kobe is a dirty player among other things, Lebron James is not capturing the imagination of the world as we imagined, Yao Ming is a headline past, Derek Jeter it seems has lost leadership of America's favorite team to love and hate, and Alex Rodriguez and Barry Bonds are beloved just so we can jeer them, and as it is today, David Beckham has does not translate to America as he does to the world, and at his age it seems as if he will not, robbing him right now of the title of moral world leader. None can step up to be the moral compass of this country and the world.

And now Captain America has fallen prey to Capitalism. The world needs a Captain, right now, it's not Captain America. We killed him. What's Iron Man up to?

THE BLACK RIDER M.I.A.

A nondescript room somewhere in New York, a lone and dusty 60 watt light bulb shines. The Inquisitor walks around the room in a menacing pace perplexed and vexed at the insolence and bravado of his subject. The Black Rider.

The Black Rider sits in a wood chair at a long steel desk looking up at the menacing man known only as The Inquisitor and wonders what question he will ask him. The Inquisitor is dapperly dressed in a white shirt, business tie and khaki pants with brown loafers and dress socks. The Black Rider wears his everyday costume, black pinstriped pants, black Italian cut blazer, white collared shirt, long black camel skin coat topped off with a black pin-striped hat, shiny black patent leather shoes and black silk socks. The Inquisitor walks around the room circling the light bulb looking at The Black Rider angrily staring, growling his mouth as he prepares his first question. The Black Rider sits at the long steel desk nonchalantly waiting for this all to be over.

"Show me your books" The Inquisitor demands. "Show me them now".

"What book?" replies The Black Rider. "You know what I'm talking about" replies The Inquisitor, "The letters you have the entire world going ga ga over. The condemned and illegal prose you have been dealing to the doe eyed masses."

The Black Rider smiles to himself. "You presume too much."

"For days" The Inquisitor goes on "You have had this entire city, the State of New York and people from all over the world reading this filth you call literature. I'm going to put a stop to it Mister Rider. I'm going to put a stop to all of this nonsense, and I'm going to put a stop to you. Until you give me some answers, I'm not letting you out of this room. You won't be able to spew your vile in here my friend. I'm going to find the author of these perverse quote on quote artworks, and if you are indeed the culprit, there will no publishing from these four walls."

"On what charge am I imprisoned for?" The Black Rider asked, "You can't just lock me up for days on end with no charge. Is this the Patriot Act at work? Am I a terrorist or something, last time I checked, New York was still an American State. This Is America is it not?"

"Oh no" replied The Inquisitor in a slow and taunting tone. "This is not America anymore. This is not the liberal filth land known as New York. This...is BLOGVILLE!"

The Triumphant

Driving to work this morning listening to 96.3 FM, The New York Times classical music station, I am feeling very inspired. They are playing an Epic composition but I will not recall the name of the composer, I will remember the title of the piece includes the word 'epic'.

My old 1993 Volvo never feels so triumphant. As the music soars, I turn the volume on maximum, I can feel the air moving through the vehicle. Visions and images start to spur from my mind, a triumphant army marching over tumbling enemies. My spirit feels so motivated, like it is a brand new day, and about half way in my journey I realize I have forgotten my lunch, my two bottles of Poland Spring water and my Cingular cellular phone. Not to be deterred since I scarcely have money or the gas wherewith to leave my job at lunch time and spend more money on a lunch I did not make, since I had spent the early hours of Monday morning preparing my lunch, five turkey sandwiches, one for each day of the week, I decide to turn the car around and collect my lunch as well as my water and cellular phone.

I drive the distance back home, pick up my lunch, and return to my car, my motive is now entirely different. Sure, I now have my most prized accessory, my phone, my lunch and my two bottles of water, but my forgetfulness is docking me fifteen minutes of pay. The music is also entirely different this time. They are now playing a drowsy, maundering composition which title and composer I am not at all interested in learning or knowing of. The music has become too fitting to the moment for my taste. And to top it off, everyone seems to be driving drunk or drunk on madness at eight 'o' clock in the morning.

School buses appear out of thin air all of a sudden and their slow and menacing pace is deliberately aggravating me. The other drivers have forgotten how to drive all together, randomly reversing into intersections and shifting lanes with no regard or concern for anyone else. Delivery trucks stall the traffic and this seems all too serendipitous.

My cars begins to shut off. First at a major intersection as soon as the red light turns green. I turn on my hazards and proceed to try and restart the car for ten seconds. I now become the aggravation. Cars drive around my stalled vehicle with contempt. The ignition kicks in. I drive and the car shuts of again at the next light. And again at another light a quarter of a mile away. I continue to turn my hazards on and cars continue to circle and I continue to aggravate the drunk drivers and those who are drunk on madness. I turn my radio off because no sonic artwork can calm my rampant screams of obscenities and blasphemous use of the name of the Christian Lord.

I make it to work. Safely. I am fifteen minutes late, thank God it's only that due to the many hiccups of my car. And I still have my lunch, cellular phone and two bottles of water. I am triumphant.

Dreams

Keep looking. Keep fighting. Do not die. Do not fall. Keep striving. Keep working. Keep earning. Keep dreaming. An old woman told me life is long. Very long. She should know. I am knowing. With each new day, each hour subtracted, I see my dreams manifest and my nightmares retracted.

I have deciphered it to be true, that death becomes me, so the inverse is true. Life becomes you.

Phenomena

She becomes your existence

A boon for your bane

She becomes your passion

You become beautifully insane

How fast is the slide from man to child

When a man becomes captured by a woman's smile

She becomes your mission

Succeed or fail

She is your passion

The wind in your sail

And for whatever reason should she choose another man

She becomes the test

To which you grade your stand

There is something phenomenal about the guise of a woman

Her skin

Her scent

Her mind

Her soul

There is something phenomenal about the guise of a lady

Her touch

Her love

Her sacrifice

Her whole

1146

Goodnight Blogville. It's a Saturday and a very busy weekend for The Black Rider. So I'm going into my archives for today's post.

In my teens and early twenties (which is like last week, I'm still 25 for another 8 days) I considered myself to be a rebellious and enlightened poet. I wrote hundreds if not thousands of poems and and a few short stories. This is poem # 1146.

Comfort

I've cried enough/

So I have a relationship/

With my tears/

They seldom touch my tongue/

But my eyes always taste them/

My tears taste like/

Rest/

The juice of my stress/

They are very warm/

Like the blood flushed hands/

Of an anxious lover/

On a smiling face/

Faith

You can lose faith in the world, you can lose faith in your friends, you can lose faith in God, you can lose faith in yourself. It is dangerous to lose such a thing as faith, because faith is all we have.

faith: 1. complete trust or confidence. 2. strong belief in a religion. 3. a system of religious belief. origin Latin fides. [Oxford Dictionary of Current English, paperback, 2001]

There you have it. A dictionary definition of faith. And in that definition lies the fault and the faculty of that word.

'Complete trust or confidence' meaning that your dedication to the subject is unbroken, unyielding, a perfect circle, and in there being, an impossibility, and an improbability. An ideal that exist in theory but not in practice.

Have faith that things will work some of the time and not all of the time and you will be adjusted to the workings of this world.

There will be irregularities in everything there is, so that it can fit in this puzzle of life. Any idea that states absolutes as whole and complete truths are not only obnoxious, but ignorant and inconsiderate.

Have faith that things will work some of the time and when they do not, have faith that you will be strong enough to bear the loss and have the reserve within you to recover from it.

Then you will be whole, complete and well adjusted.

On Your Mark, Get Set, Get Money

So I've read "How to win friends and influence people" by Dale Carnegie, and I've read "The 48 laws of Power" by Robert Greene, and I've also read "The Art of Seduction" also from Robert Greene.

Those books work. I have friends, influence over people, power, and if the stars are right I can be very seductive. But I do not have money. I did my budget forecast for the next 2 weeks and I'm banking a whopping total of 30 dollars and 5o cents. After my Internet bills and my gas and credit card and cell phone payments and the rent and what not, I have 30 dollars and 50 cents.

Now what good is having friends if you cannot adequately entertain them or influence over people if you cannot embellish it with a little gratitude or Power if you cannot dress the part or even seductive qualities if you can't indulge in luxuries.

My friends, money is necessary. I need to read a book about money. That's the skill I lack right now. Once I learn how to create that, my circle will be complete. I need to get to the point where after I work out my budget, my bank will be something I can be flexible and productive with.

$30.50 is hardly that.

Monsters and Transgression

I am a monster. A sadistic melancholy manic. It seems to me that this should be tragic, but it could also be beneficial.

I can be a monster in bed. A monster at winning. I would rather have a monster guard my house than a poodle.

Life is tragic and filled with failures. If one is handed lemons one is to make lemonade, if one is handed tragedy one is to write stories and songs. If one is dealt and or creates monstrosities, one is to become a monster.

The world is not built for the week and or feeble. You must be swift, merciless, decisive in all that you do. Then you will have success and annihilate puny fools who stand in your way to greatness and obliterate foes who dare to stand against you.

In my book, it is better to be great and revered, for whatever cause, than to be forgotten and a loser.

Death Becomes Us

You are involved

Eloise and Abelard

I could forget. I could forget it ever existed. Trade one mania for another. I could create an amnesia. Dismiss the very existence of my sorrows.

In Buddhism, they teach you that one way to dispel suffering is to dispel desire. Well, what of dispelling the memory of it.

If I can recall, I can desire and or detest that which I have recalled. I do not want the element of destruction in my life or in my mind, however natural or unnatural it may be, and I do not want to desire something that I cannot, should not, or am not allowed to have.

It would be so much easier if I could just forget it. But I can't. I wear it everyday. I see it everywhere I go. And I hear of it on every radio station and TV show.

I was much happier when I was clean. When I never knew of unrelenting desires. When I was a child and the world and the things in it were the concerns of other and not of mine.

There is a Poem called Eloise and Abelard, from the English Poet Alexander Pope. It is about a forty year old French teacher 'Abelard' and an eighteen year old student 'Eloise' who he falls in love with in the eighteenth century.

As the story goes, and it is a true one, Abelard gets Eloise pregnant. They marry in secret against the wishes of her her family and her family in turn contracts a gang of thugs to castrate Abelard as he sleeps.

Abelard being a teacher and philosopher takes this in stride and adopts the life of a Eunuch, first joining a monastery and then living the life of a hermit.

Eloise does not take it so easily. She is still in love with him. She still want to make love to him and dreams about it even though it is physically impossible.

They exchange a series of four letters which become the subject of folklore and history and the subject of Mr. Pope's poem which takes the point of view of Eloise who lusts for the love of Abelard but is unable to be quenched of it.

Instead she begs to forget. She says only God can take the place of her dear Abelard and wants to forget that he ever became.

Such is my pain. Such is my dementia.

I cannot dispel desire when it arises and I will not create destruction so I can detest something. My own personal morality is my folly.

I want what is not possible. I have experienced a fantasy and believed it to be real. Yoda said to Anakin, you must learn to let go the things that you fear to lose. Wise words.

"How happy is the blameless vestal's lot!

The world forgetting, by the world forgot.

Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind!Each pray'r accepted, and each wish resign'd;"
Eloise and Abelard,
Alexander Pope

Comics

I have rediscovered comics. The paper magazines of illustration, mythologies and heroics have come back full swing in my life. I like them.

Every Friday when I leave work around 4: 30 or so, I stop by the comic book shop in West Hempstead, New York called "The Long Box". The owner is long dread locked hair black man who knows his comics and speaks with a voice so deep it is like the voice of God.

He's got X-men, Spider man, Superman, Batman, mostly hero stuff. Classics in long boxes throughout the store. He even has some comics in the back, the black and white Conan the Barbarian titles from my childhood, and he can tell you who wrote, published, and did the artwork for the cover and the lettering in one breath.

He's got the right stuff.

I can always count on him to also have the newest and most entertaining titles. The "Civil Wars" series from marvel, a novel and very interesting approach.

Civil Wars: Spider Man gets unmasked to America, his former secret identity, "Peter Parker" is now pubic knowledge. While he fights alongside his comrades in costume, they refer to him as 'Peter', rather than 'Spidey'.

Captain America and Iron man fight against each other over the "Mutant Registration Act" that requires all persons with super human powers and abilities register with the government.

Captain America takes the stand against the Mutant Registration Act and Iron Man takes the stand for it. Heroes choose sides, Spider man sides with Iron man, the New Avengers and the X-men at large side with Captain America.

It all played out over the summer and fall of last year, 2006, and now we have the "Casualties of War" series.

To me this is engrossing stuff. And entertaining. I am Twenty five years old and a few weeks away from becoming Twenty Six.

I am now officially a "Comic head".

Amen.

Set Your House in Order.

So it's another Friday night. What are we going to do? Go out and get drunk, high and laid right? If you can afford to, by all means yes. But remember it is still the beginning of the year. Now is a good time to set your house in order.


We have a three day weekend guys. I think this is the best time to get ready to clean your house of all its clutter, throw out the trash, get your calendars and affairs prioritized and in order.


There is a lot of money to be made. Us humans have countless needs. Find out what your purpose is in this world. Become intentional. Make an offering.


I declare today set your house in order day. I know I will be doing it. Lets grow together and change the world for our children.

Sunlight.

Nothing will do me better right now than sunlight and air. The minerals of stone and salt and the nutrients of the coconut plant and the mango tree and all the glories of my country, Jamaica.

New York is nice. I heart New York. But it is very cold an uninhabitable here right now.

I woke up this morning to ice rain, then as the day progressed there came the water rain, and as I left work came the snow.

God has a sense of humor. Believe me. He really does.

Nothing can do me now like Jamaica. I'm dreaming of white sand beaches right now. A spa. Blue sky and sunlight. This is madness.

Why Must I Read Everything?

I must really be obsessive in some fashion. Could it be that I read to much? And to top it off at that, could it be that I read too much junk?

I try to be as contemporary and informed as possible but can never seem to get all the knowledge I want at a fast enough pace.

It may very well be that I read too slow. That my appetite for learning is not on par with my hunger and desire for knowledge as well as learning.

And to fix that problem will take even more reading of speed reading books.

Is is worth it? All this reading that we do. You can't take it with you, you know, your learning. It stays here on this earth just like your riches, whatever quantity of that you may have.

So why strive? I try to read the best and most informative articles from every newspaper I see, and every magazine that strikes my fancy.

I would be quiet content to stay here in my studio and read about the world all day from daily newspapers and the Internet and watch it on TV and only go out to see it for myself about once a month when there is really something interesting going on. Like something I would want to witness firsthand and write a first person account of.

I want to see every good movie. Right now the movie du jour for me is "Factory Girl" starring Sienna Miller. Looks very interesting.

Its seems as is if I have a case not only of information overload, but also acute information pollution.

Clean out and filter the useless worthless information, like a review of a restaurant you have no intention of ever visiting, and the album review of a band you have no intention of ever listening to in your lifetime.

But then at the end of the day, even the good information is temporal. You can't take it when you die.

Or can you?

Matters not. I say to read what gratifies and edifies you. Read the words that enrich your life. Learn them.

I guess that is why I read so much. I am greedy and I want everything. I want wealth of riches and gratification. But I can never read everything. Eventually, everything becomes the trash.

Easy Come, Easy Go.

Good morning Blogville. So nice to be here again. I had a good weekend so far. Got my hair cut, went to see a show yesterday, support the arts, it was good. Life is short man, you got to live in the now you know.

It is very cold here in New York. And my car drives very crazy. I have a 1993 Volvo 850. Good car. Mine is just old. 170,000 miles old. Driving that thing across the New York streets makes me feel like I'm in some futuristic film and I got a raggedy old car trudging over depressed terrain. And I can't afford to fix it.

I have no problem taking the bus. I should think about doing that, cause this car thing is taxing and right now it's just more than I can bear. Stay tuned though Blogville, I will have pictures of the show to show you guys, and it will all be edited with trusty Google Picasa.

Say Farewell.

So she doesn't have to wake up anymore. Her pain will not weigh so heavily on her shoulders no longer. She can rest in peace.

Sure they will still duel over lawsuits and the paternity and the pathology and toxicology. But she will not be there for it. The pain became too much and she expired prematurely. What was left for her? The remnants of youth fading so quickly, her son suddenly dead on the day her second child was born. Her companion consistently raking in motherloads of mullah for her interviews and reality TV shows and her inheritance.

So many of the players in this parade are passed away. The 67 year old step son forging a block between Anna Nicole Smith and 500 million dollars: gone. The first heir to her fortune, her oldest male child: gone. Her companion is left to sort out the affairs now.

Mr. Howard K. Stern.
When will your tears fall. Who will do those million dollar entertainment tonight interviews? Is there a book to be released? Many questions arise now Mr. Stern, which I'm sure you have thought out the answers to. A lot of this stinks to high hell. A "commitment ceremony" after you stepson's death in the Bahamas, a beaming smile on both your faces.

She was tired. Very tired. She has left this world and said farewell. What say you?

Matters not much. Anna Nicole Smith is asleep now. And where she is, she is with old man daddy moneybags J. Howard Marshall, and her son Daniel, and she can relax. You are still here, and you Mr. Howard K. Stern, have statements to make.

Peace.

Take Out the Paper (And the Trash).

Good night blogville. How I wish this was all I had to do in life. Read and post blogs. But there are more important matters at hand aren't there, like taking out the paper and the trash. And there is so much paper.

In this digital world you would think the amount of paper waste a household creates would greatly be diminished. That is not so. Most of the trash in my house is paper.

If you were to weigh the weight of trash from food and plastics and steel and the weight of trash from paper, I'm almost certain that the weight of the paper trash would be on par with any variable of garbage found in the modern home even in 2007.

You think we would have had enough. With our cable Internet and our satellite TV and our cell phone and text message and web sites. You would think we would have had enough of this paper mess.

Not so. There is still the everyday deluge of Junk mail, Credit Card offers, bank solicitations, Club fliers, newspapers (some of us are required by our jobs to read three daily), business cards, receipts. Trashy books.

All of this can be very overwhelming. Paper is almost a part of everything we do. There is toilet paper, newspaper, newsletter, magazines, posters, poster ads, tocket stubs, and the like.

How do we process so much information so fast. You can spend 24 hours a day processing the various paper press of your community.

And the trash. That's what all this paper becomes eventually. Trash. The Sunday times and all its magazines and coupons and circulars and arts and leisure section become trash come Monday morning. So do your plastic cups after you've drank the contents. And so does your french fry cup and your hamburger case and the wrapper its in and the brown paper bag they put it in.

We should all eat digital food. You got your plastic soda bottles and water bottles and your plastic ketchup bottles and your plastic condoms and your plastic this and your plastic that.

All of this becomes trash.

Is there digital trash. The delete button is most convenient. Look how easily we dispose of unwanted files on our computers. And all we have to do is raise an index finger. Not even a hand. If you so desire you can somewhat trade your terrestrial life for a digital one. My cellphone and bank and credit card companies all offer me the option of cancelling paper billing solely for online billing. I always deny them for the simple fact that if my online fails me I still the paper in hand to take care of business. Did I just imply that I am backing up my online activities with tangible objects.

The times they are a changing.

Storage had gone from space to material. From four walls to carbon to glass. It will take a long time though. Blogs and what not are the way of tomorrow, but you can't buy it a newsstand for 50 cents a pop. Till then, organize your paper, organize your cash, set your accounts in order, and take out the trash.

Top Story

Good morning blogville. It's another Saturday, but this one is not easy at all. The weather outside where I live in Long Island New York is very cold. Freezing. Makes you want to stay home and do nothing at all. But we cannot do that can we. This is a cold world after all so it is only natural that Frigid weather occur to remind us of the hostile environment we inhabit.

If there is anyone out there that favors freezing weather please announce yourself. Not that someone of that sort will come across this blog because no one is reading it but if by chance you do come across this please let me know. I've been in New York now for almost 12 years and the cold still gets to me.

Of course I am somewhat acclimated but I still get a mean face when the weather dips below 40 degrees and the wind starts to blow.

And the weatherman on the radio does not help at all. It seems as if they are plotting to keep you in your warm bed listening to radio news so you don't have to go outside and face the real world.

Top Story: It is freezing outside. Do not leave your homes. Stay in bed. Thousands are dead in Iraq. New York is freezing over. It's cold. Stay in bed and listen to our programs we can have high ratings and more ad dollars.

Yeah. You know what guys. This is my top story. So what suckers, yeah its cold outside, but don't let that stop you. Go out and face the world. Bundle up. It's a cold world bitches so this kind of weather is expected. Why you complaining. We have not even had a blizzard this year. Go out and make some money and the next time I find any one of you peasants in bed past the hour of sunrise I'll fire a lighting bolt up your ass.

Peace.

Nudity Guns and Tragedy

ALPHA DOG


Pretty good movie. White boy Justin Timberlake can act pretty good. He shows a great range of emotion going from happy go lucky to goonish very naturally.

But he is not the only good thing about this movie. The entire cast provided strong, adept, believable performances, saving a somewhat bland screenplay.


This is a good movie to eat popcorn and take a girl on a date out to. Not boring and you will not fall asleep. Emile Hirsch (the girl next door) is so so as Johnny Trulove, the antagonist in the film and Ben Foster (x-men the last stand) is dynamic as Jake Mazursky, a troubled drug dealer/thug whose antics set in motion the events that anchor the film.


If you like nudity guns and tragedy, this is the film for you. Another movie that has ample doses of nudity guns and tragedy is Smokin' Aces.

It's also got a lot more blood than Alpha Dog too, but less sex. It stars Jeremy Piven and a who's who of Hollywood big names, but the surprising standouts aren't even actors at all. Common and Alicia Keys steal the show. Look for Common upstaging and out acting Jeremy Piven in every scene they appear in together. And Alicia Keyes is one bad ass gun toting lesbian loving thug with a soft spot for bald headed tough guys.

The basic plot is Jermy Piven plays a drug addicted mob magician, Buddy Israel who's got a hit on his head for turning rat. The character is a fun one, but it seems as if Mr. Piven is too tired of playing the self destructive type to have any fun in this role. He pretty much sleeps through the movie.

But not to worry, Director Joe Carnahan has lots of eye candy that more than makes up for the cliche story lines and plot twists.

The costumes in this film are electric and the colors and cinematography are really expressive.

If anything the film could have used a car chase. My suggestion, and I'm not giving away anything here, have a spin off where Common and Alicia Keyes can really get busy and sink their teeth into their respective characters, and hopefully each other.

As far as date movies go, I give Alpha Dog a third base. Smokin' Aces, you're scoring baby.

Easy Saturday

Good day Blogville. Not like anybody is reading this damn thing but anyway...you will come soon enough, believe me you will come. Well it's another Saturday. Another winter day to be easy. Drive your car slow soundboys, turn up the sound system really loud. This is Saturday. Get yourself a cute lil shorty and make her smile like she got smiley teeth.

Get money. Saturday is a day to get dat money. Smoke that herb till your head is heavy like a lead box. Drink till you walk in circles on purpose to hide the fact that cannot possibly walk straight. And leave some money for the offering plate on Sunday morning.

Bless up!

Winter Blues

It is getting really cold in New York. Global warming has gone into hibernation. Old man winter has come to stake his forte. Tomorrow morning it is going to be negative seven degrees Fahrenheit windchill.
Buckle up boys and girls. The deep freeze is here. Here are my two cents on how to avoid being frozen and/or victimized by this annual natural disaster in Concrete Jungle New York

1. Do not drive your hoopty.

Thas right. If you own a car thas over seven years old with old tires and shaky transmission and tires as smooth as a babies bottom, its probably best that you do not drive it when there is ice covering every square inch of the metropolis. You will more than likely have your car careen of a major highway, dilly and dolly on local roads and perpetually annoy everyone who has all terrain vehicles such as those fancy dancy SUV's and such.

2. Get a Lover

Hmm Hmmm, find another pair of thighs to rub on besides your own. If you don not do this you could freeze to death in your own bed. The clinical term for this is becoming frigid.

3. Drink Hot Chocolate

Never forget to drink HOT HOT chocolate. It has been rumored that a cold intestine is a dead intestine. Keep those suckers warm. You are going to need them to eat those summer hot dogs when it finally gets warm again 20 years from now.

4. Read My Blog.

Thas right. Nothing in this world is going to keep you more warm than this lil blog of mine. Come here for wit, commentary and entertainment. Come you huddled masses shivering in the cold. Come on to my blog and feel the warmth of my words. After all, what else are you going to do anyway? It's too cold for even reindeer games right now. Even Santa and his helpers took the night off.

Do these four things blogville, and you winter will be short, bitter, and merciless. If you don't, it will be long, bitter and deadly. Peace out. I am the The Black Rider, and these are my words.

A House on Fire

Smoke anyone? Quite attractive isn't it. Fire is an alluring element. Smell it, smells like freshness, feel it, feels piercing and punishing, consuming its host in a passionate display.
Lyricist use it to evoke fury and promptness. Visual artists use it to illustrate activity and chaos. It is disturbingly attractive, and there is nothing quite as attractive to a doe eyed mob as a house on fire.
Literally or figuratively speaking, it will be hard to find anything that gathers a throng of onlookers, cameras, commentators, rescuers and miracle workers than a haven being demolished to nothingness and bare remnants.
I like to call it the vicious and merciless poem. Case in point: steroids, narcotics and amphetamines, lies, cheating and betrayal, disease, violence. Those of us who have been scorched, and decimated by these vices are catapulted to an arena of scrutiny, judgment, and verdict.
Look at the greats who after setting their houses on fire, or being set on fire by someone or something else, are hallowed and revered and held in the court of public opinion as either sacred, or savage.
Jimi Hendrix, Bob Marley, Barry Bonds, Martin Luther King Jnr, Tupac Shakur, Magic Johnson, Biggie Smalls, Mark Mcguire, Malcom X,
John F Kennedy, Abraham Lincoln, John Coltrane, Billie Holiday, Janis Joplin, Aaliyah, and the list goes on and on.
There are contemporary public figures now who's houses have burned, or is burning, and have been notarized and publicized as a result. The three obvious ones that come to mind are Britney, Paris and Lindsay. No last name needed right. And we are all having fun watching there houses burn. And it looks as if they nor us are interested in putting out the flames any time soon. What is important here is that we gather, and look.

All Night Long

Good morning blogville. Don't we all miss summer? It has been a great winter here in Long Island New York, with no heat in my car, the weather has surely been kind to me. But I tell you what bums me about winter time anyway. Too much night.

I think I get to leave work pretty early everyday. 4:30 pm. And 15 minutes after I get home its dark outside. It wouldn't be so bad if it were like this all year, but you get so spoiled in the summer time. Imagine getting home and you have four hours of daylight left in your day. What motivation. Now all I have is fifteen minutes. Nothing is free right? So I figure you pay for your summer days with your winter nights.

Kind of a downer you know. The first thing you want to do is take a nap.
And sometimes you try to do it all night long. There will be no naked women for you boys and girls this morning. I'm to weary and too sleepy. Good Night.

iPhone

With a title like that I'm sure my search engine appearances are likely to take a boost. Well the iPhone is out. That's it on the right. On the left is a sexy girl that has nothing to do with the topic. Just some eye candy. I know what's important in life.
























It can go on a real web site, make a real phone call, and play a real mp3. It goes for 500 or 600 bucks and holds 4 or 8 gigs of ram. Wow. Apple even went and changed its name from Apple Computers to Apple inc. Looks like apple bout to stick its nose into everything. What's next? Apple bubblegum? What they need to do is start Apple records and sighn my ass cause they got a lot of money over there.

The House, The Car & The Girl

Good evening blogville. If anybody is reading that is. My post for the day is about getting things done.

Is there enough time in the day. We have so much to do in one day and the human body can only endure and bear so much at a given time before giving out to fatigue and exhaustion.

We have to keep our houses, our bodies, as our work spaces clean. We have to pay bills on time and keep track of them. A lot of us have our extracurricular activities, sports, churches, clubs and what have you. How do we keep up this balance and stay alive at the same time?

I think the answer is that we don't.

Everyday, the sun gives us energy and in return takes a little away from us as well. Our mad dash to sustain our livelihoods erodes our bodies, our minds, our earth. And there doesn't seem to be a change to that system anytime soon.

As a single man trying to start a company and promote musicians, life can get pretty lugubrious. Driving to meetings. Keeping up the car. Supplying stores. Keeping track of inventory. Dateing. Creating artwork. How do you get all of this done?

If there is anyone out there reading this, I would like to hear from you. We All want the best in life don't we? Don't you? The house, the car, and the girl.

Good Morning Blogville.

Wus up world. Anybody got a car. I need a car. I need a Bugatti. That will do me just right. I need somone to buy one of my beats. Who wants to buy a beat. I make beats you know that. Buy my beats and make me rich please. It's no fun being broke and driving an old ass volvo. That car bout to break down soon. I'm on borrowed time now.

What I Really need is money though. If I make enough money, I can have all the cars, money and girls I want. Then I will be truly happy. And now for your gratuious photo of a sexy girl for no particular reason.

Let The Hacking Begin

Good evening blogville. Well its been a while. I must say I haven't been on this like I've wanted to because I do not know who is looking at my blog and how many of you residents of blogville are actually viewing. Someone said that my blog did nothing for them because it was a bung of stuff from youtube. well I will improve upon that. This blog will now have a bunch of stuff from utube, msn video, google video, and whatever user generated media is out there. I'm going to hack at the world. Eat it suckers.

Now for your viewing pleasure, here is a picture of a sexy girl. Enjoy. And come here for more.